Thursday, November 12, 2026

Hallmark Movies and Doping in Bike Racing

I recently watched a few funny youtube commentaries on Hallmark movies. The reviewer roasts the well-worn, ham-fisted tropes in those movies. I think that Hallmark movie subgenre and its male equivalent form of entertainment--like Walker: Texas Ranger are pretty interesting to contemplate from the point of view of "mental models" versus the actual 3D reality world.

This category of entertainment is unabashedly dumb on purpose. The formulae of the events and characters in these shows is tightly constrained over an arbitrary range, possibly defined by advertisers' opinions about what's acceptable. Also, the audience probably doesn't even want to concentrate or think about what they're being shown on the screen, and certainly they don't want it to stir up feelings of pain or regret from their own life, nor do they want to see the goals and ideals people think are worthwhile are actually scams and/or meaningless.

For example, it's common for an idealized priest or religious leader type character to appear on these shows, while the sloppy/scammy reality of religious institutions is elided from the scripts. The main characters of these shows are often happy, successful participants in the corporate rat-race, but they never have to work. In the male fantasy shows, when there is corporate or government corruption, it isn't ubiquitous, it's isolated and can be corrected by the lead character taking appropriate action to return things to a good state.

The popular entertainment slop is a good cipher for the scandals around doping in pro sports, specifically bicycle racing. The "official" narrative of pro sports is like the hallmark movies and driven by the desire of corporate sponsors to sell their junk. Anything that falls outside the confines of the range of approved tropes is punished. The official narratives are reinforced by PR people. For example, in the early 2000s the Discovery Channel did a documentary about the unique physiology of Lance Armstrong. Recently, HBO did a similar documentary about the current reigning cycling superstar Tadej Pogacar who is even more dominant at the sport than Lance Armstrong was.

The official media and spokespeople of pro cycling, plus the overall PR machine of pro cycling pushes the hallmark script about the sport. Anyway, the question: "what's the idealism all about?" is very intriguing. Where does it come from? What is it? Like what is it actually that defines the tropes of the hallmark movies and pro sports?




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